Truth about EVPs & the bullshxt

We have all seen the TV programs where the celeb pulls out a sound recorder to capture those spooky things called EVPs. 

But STOP! Let’s look at this in greater detail.

Now I know that there are people out there that are going to shout me down because this is one of their major ways of collecting evidence, along with spirit boxes and grainy photos. But what I am about to do is try and provide you with some logical explanation to why this is a load of bull.

There are those of you who watch all the ghost hunting shows and take everything they say and do as gospel. So you see the equipment that they use as 100% legit. 

But what about the equipment you don’t see? 

To gather an EVP (Electronic voice phenomenon) you need some sort of audio recording device. Whether that be a digital voice recorder or a tape machine. That can be your preference. But as long as it can record sound, you are good to go.

You then ask a question and more often than not you get what some people class as a response from the other side. But that is very debatable. 

So those TV celebs are there in what is classed as a haunted place and then out comes the magical sound recorder. They walk down a dark corridor or place it on a table and start asking some questions. They even shout at the ghost in order to provoke a response. But instead of the ghost just shouting something like “fxxk off you knobhead, we don’t want you here because we are trying to get some rest”. What do they do? They say “Pray your God” or “Spirit” or Goodwin (All responses taken from ghost adventures). Plus they never do it so that everyone can hear it. 

Why is that? 

Why is it that ghosts never speak in sentences more than four words? Plus, why always into a sound recorder which you have to play back later which in turn stops you replying at the time.

Now, I don’t care if you are alive or dead. If you were a being that could hold a full blown conversation in life. Why have you all of a sudden become unable to carry on putting a full sentence together instead of sentence that a baby could put together? I mean if a ghost can turn on lights, open cupboards, throw things, move a planchette and open doors. Which are all things we as humans can do in the most part. Then why only speak in utter rubbish giving cryptic clues?

The other thing which I started to say before going on a little rant. 

What you often don’t see (or maybe sometimes you do) is the crew behind the main ghost hunters in these TV shows.

When it comes to sound on TV. It is one of the most important factors in the whole filmmaking process and that is what let’s most amature productions down. You try and watch a program without the sound and it takes a good 85% of the impact away. So TV shows rely on good audio.

The point I am trying to get to is TV shows don’t rely on just one recording source, but a few. 

If you look at the photo at the beginning of this post of good old Zak and his chums. You’ll notice that I have marked out 3 mics. 

1. A shotgun mic on a boom pole.

2. Camera Mic

3. And a wireless Lav mic

Not to mention the wireless mics that Zaks buddie maybe wearing. 

So that’s 3 top of the range microphones and a professional sound recorder that the sound guy with the boom pole carries in a bag which in turn could cost approx £1000 upwards. And all of a sudden, they need a fourth hand held recorder to capture evidence? 

Jesus knock me sideways. 

If all that expensive equipment doesn’t capture anything and that £50 recorder does? Then someone needs to have a serious talk with all these high end players that make some of the best gear in the world and tell them they have been doing it wrong all these years.

Don’t people ever stop and think? Why has that noise been picked up by their crappy recorder and not their expensive equipment? Plus, why just that one? 

Maybe it’s because the pre-amps are that noisey that any noise that is captured is automatically is covered by static. So things like hand movement, rubbing on clothing, foot steps etc is covered by the static which in turn sometimes can sound like words because of a thing called “Maxtrixing” which is basically your mind trying to make sense of what is seen or heard. And that is why people often see faces etc in grainy lowlight photos. But that’s an argument for another time.

So do I believe EVPs are real? I would say if there is such a thing, then they would be extremely rare. Especially if these ghosts can’t even string a sentence together. 

But before I close my little blog post. I know that someone out there will try and be a smart arse and say the spirit projects to that specific recorder. Well how does it do that when 9 times out of ten, most so called ghosts where around before electricity, never mind sound recorders etc and wouldn’t understand the concept behind the whole recording thing and even if they do understand and they were around during our technical age. Wouldn’t they go to what looks like the best equipment? Plus like I have already said, they seem to struggle to put more than four words together, so I doubt they could direct traffic, never mind their energy. 

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